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Temper gets a particular hold those with ADD [Attention Deficit Disorder] because of the tendency for emotional flooding to occur.• Never try to deal with a temper when it is active.• Make plans when all is calm, cool, and collected. And with your willingness, you can learn alternatives that work particularly well for you in dealing with family and work settings, the places where temper is most likely to work against you.
In our house, it’s the “time out” sign used in sports.
Anyone in the family can use it and we automatically stop—no questions asked. This time-out breaks into the flooding and stops the emotions from taking over.
Know, however, that he needs to take responsibility for his display of temper. Most people with tempers will display just as much temper as they can get away with.
So, if you don’t like the temper outbursts, tell him you are simply unwilling to put up with them.
The earlier temper control is begun, the easier it is to effect alternative ways for its management.
A temper is something that lives only through reinforcement.
It can be controlled in the child if the child is taught to find other means to get his or her needs met.
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But, because that rarely happens, let’s pick up on the adult level, learning how to break the temper cycle. Someone cutting in front of you on the freeway may have triggered your anxiety, surprised you, or frightened you, but your reaction is your responsibility.• You must realize that there are other ways to react to the stress.